I still cannot get over from your death yet. Saw an article written by a Zard fans, Wai-Man from Holland and I almost broke into tears:

"These past two days had been a torture. All I did was eating and sleeping, eating and sleeping. Just the bare minimum to survive. And it's only when I'm sleeping I can forget about everything. The report I've been working on needs to be finished by next month. But I still haven't put down a single word, ever since I knew about the tragic news. I don't remember anymore what I did exactly the first day. The second day has been even worse, because it was then that I realized you were really gone, and that this all wasn't just a bad nightmare. Worst of all is that I can't find comfort anymore while listening to your songs. It used to be my favorite passing time. But it makes me so sad that I'm afraid to touch my own music player...

I feel guilty that I've been living so carefree the past year, while you were fighting for your life. Why you didn't want to let us know? You've always encouraged us with your music, whenever we feel down. But now that you needed the support the most, we couldn't do anything to help you at all. Please tell me you haven't suffered until the very last moment. It will break my heart otherwise. Why did you work so hard to make a comeback in your condition? There was really no need. You are always no.1 in my heart. You should have waited until you were fully recovered. I don't mind to wait, no matter how many years it might be...

I miss the joy we had whenever there was an annoucement of a new release. The joy when the cover was revealed with your photo. The first sample of the song with your voice that we will always hear from Wezard.net. The hunt to find the new PV for your song, even though it might be only a slideshow. I didn't care at all! I will miss this everything. To know there won't be any new releases anymore is just too much...

I will try to be strong for you. And maybe someday I will be able to tell everyone how proud I am of you. Yes, it's truely an honor to be a Zard fan. Hope you are well."

I know I cannot look forward to your new singles or albums again. Your wonderful stories have ended in the year of 2007. I will remember it and will continue to play your previous songs whenever I miss you, till the last breath of my life.....

Labels: Musics

“坂井泉水於去年6月, 因罹患子宫颈癌, 於东京都内某医院持续入院出院, 与病魔对抗。因做了摘除手术, 病情曾一度好转, 但因确认出子宫颈癌己转移至肺部, 今年4 月不得不再度入院。由於主治医师及医院同仁治疗的关係, 最近早晨可以到医院空地内散步, 每天都很坚强, 期待早日康复。5月26日早上, 於返回病房途中, 在经过楼梯间时（约3公尺高）, 因前一天下雨滑倒摔落, 后脑受到重击, 是其主要死因。”



妳走了，我无法相信这是事实。
我很惭愧，竟然在妳逝世 3 天后才知道。
今天早上上班前，在买咖啡时，突然收到开劲的 sms ，告诉我妳逝世的消息，我简直吓了一跳。
于是匆匆地付了钱，拿着咖啡赶快走去 office 上网查证。
进入常去的 Zardnet.com , 当看到以下 homepage 时，我的心整个塌了下来，呼吸停止片刻。
为什么是妳？为什么这么早就离开我们? 心里不停地问，可是却没有人可以回答。
只活了 40 岁的妳，就像划过夜空的流星，虽然短暂，但却灿烂地照耀了大地。我会永远惦记妳的。



直到现在，我还是宁愿相信这只是一场梦而已。想起来也蛮巧，妳逝世的当晚，我还因为一阵子没听妳的歌，而在临睡前点播选了数十首歌。那时候在想，很久没听了，还是那么动听，什么时候可以再听到妳的新歌。但现在，它是不可能的事了.....
我不知所措，当看到妳葬礼的照片时，心里有一股冲动，想马上跑去现场为妳哀悼。
不过，以后如果有机会去 Tokyo ，我一定会去看看妳的。



我是来了新加坡后才认识妳的。来到这里不到半年，有一天很偶然地在 Clementi 的一间 CD 小店找到妳的一张精选辑 [ZARD Best.Request.Memorial] 。那时候不知道里面的歌好不好听，只是因为它的封面很好看，想更多地认识妳，就买下了。然后就从这张专辑，一首接一首的疯狂迷上了，至今我几乎拥有了妳所有的歌，iPod 里也放了两百首歌，从未被 deleted 过。



每次回 KL 时都会听妳的歌，相信以后都会。这 7 年里，开心和悲伤的时候都有妳的歌陪伴。是妳的歌不断激励我，让我改变对人生的看法，变得不再消极，勇往直前。没有了妳，我知道我会比从前更加珍惜妳。



每次听妳的歌，很自然会想起过去 7 年发生的点点滴滴，包括我和她之间的事情。过去就让它过去吧.....



一来到新加坡就认识妳，妳的离开是否意味着我会离开新加坡呢？近来，我的确想离开这里.....

Labels: Musics

昨晚和一个来自香港的旧同事 chat 到凌晨 5 点，结果早上打羽球时力不从心，无法集中精神。
很想去香港，想去那里旅行、工作或者长期定居。喜欢香港，可能是因为从小就一直看无线港剧、听广东歌，爱上了它的文化。所以和那位旧同事聊天也蛮投缘的，感觉比较舒服。
虽然香港的工作压力会比这里大，消费也比较贵，但很想趁年轻的时候去更多国家闯闯。
而且，在新加坡七年了，开始感到厌倦，觉得这里很沉闷，食物难吃，选择也很少，消遣的地方来来去去都是那几个。新加坡政府想打造一个 world class 的城市，想把它完美化，不过这样却使它失去了原有的东方色彩。
如果不能去香港工作，我想东京和上海是不错的选择。
想要体验生活，而不是过生活。一成不变的生活很难受，摆脱种种束缚，放肆一下自己，有可能吗？

之前因为电影《A Song To The Sun》认识了 Yui，因为看起来很有气质、漂亮，开始留意她，并接触她唱过的歌。
开始的时候并不怎么喜欢她的歌，因为很 "Avril Lavigne"和"Alanis Morissette" 的感觉。
不过听了好几次，慢慢被她征服。
有时候分不清楚到底是欣赏她的才华，还是喜欢上她的外表。
毕竟，两全其美的东西多少都带点欺骗的成份。
我们，却喜欢追求这样的东西。
心里总是期待有一天能够拥有，
即使知道它存有那一点点的虚假.....









1st album: 2006 年 [From Me To You]











2nd album: 2007 年 [Can't Buy My Love]










I always think that I can't live up to the expectations of somebody. Though I feel jaded sometimes, I never give up making myself to the destination, coz' I care what others think about me.

Labels: Musics

星期天的晚上再次失眠，只好上网看新闻，读读朋友的 Blog 。
不知不觉，原来已经单身两年了。
两年前的五月，我和妳说再见。没想到从此以后，大家都没见过面。
这两年里，做了许多事情，留下许多足迹。
有快乐的，有愚蠢的，也有些值得回忆的。
想告诉妳，我还在听周杰伦的歌；
想告诉妳，我不时还在看周星弛；
想告诉妳，我还是支持着Man U；
想告诉妳，我比从前更爱打羽球；
不过，事过境迁，也许没有这个必要了.....

病了三天，星期五是大感冒，刚巧 Ray 升请客，Adrian 也因为生日请吃 Durian Prata ，结果 miss 掉这千载难逢的机会，真 sianz! 大感冒过后就是头痛，痛了两天，做什么都没心情。应该是睡眠不足的关系，再加上步入中年，不象以前那么 fit 了，是时候培养早睡早起的好习惯。

开始工作以后都想拥有一个比较成熟比较 class 的手表，旧的 DKNY 和 Casio 都不能派上用场。结果上个星期天在 Bugis 的一间小店买了一只手表，属于 Seiko Sportura 系列之一。第一眼看到就爱不释手，它的设计很精细很特别，看起来也蛮 sporty 的，原价大概是 SGD800 ，经过一番讨价还价后（一下子而已，因为不会讲价），以 SGD602 成交。虽然折扣了不少，不过它还是一生中买过最贵的东西。之前买过最贵的是去年的 Sony 6.1 mega pixels CyberShot camera，大约SGD550， 没想到一年后我就刷新记录。希望这个记录可以保持多几年，不想在不久的将来宣告破产。
还有，它的 leather strap 可以换成 metal 的，够 flexible ，真的真的很喜欢。它算是我第一只认真去买的手表，我找了好久才找到，DKNY 那只是 colleague 送的，Casio 那只是贪便宜，才SGD50 ，相差好远。

LESSON 1
A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting.
On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp.
They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, 'Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each'
So the eager senior manager shouted, 'I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries.' Pfufffff, and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted 'I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails.'
Pfufffff, and he was also gone.
The boss calmly said, 'I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 12.35pm.'

*MORAL OF THE STORY IS: ' ALWAYS ALLOW THE BOSSES TO SPEAK FIRST'*


LESSON 2
Standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
'Listen,' said the CEO, 'this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?'
'Certainly,' said the young executive.
He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
'Excellent, excellent!' said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the shredder machine.
'I just need one copy.'

*LESSON II - NEVER, NEVER ASSUME THAT YOUR BOSS KNOWS EVERYTHING.*


LESSON 3
An American and a Japanese were sitting on the plane on the way to LA
When the American turned to the Japanese and asked, 'What kind of -ese are you?'
The Japanese confused, replied, 'Sorry but I don't understand what you mean.'
The American repeated, 'What kind of -ese are you?'
Again, the Japanese was confused over h is question.
The American, now irritated, then yelled, 'What kind of -ese are you... Are you a Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese!, etc......???'
The Japanese then replied, 'Oh, I am a Japanese.'
A while later the Japanese turned to the American and asked what kind of 'key' was he.
The American, frustrated, yelled, 'What do you mean what kind of -kee' am I ?!'
The Japanese said, 'Are you a Yankee, donkee, or monkee?'

*LESSON III - NEVER INSULT ANYONE.*


LESSON 4
There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an American and a French, who found this small genie bottle. When they rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared.
Thankful that the 4 guys had released him out of the bottle, he said, 'Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I will give each of you a wish. When you run towards the pool and jump, you shout what you want the pool of water to become, then your wish will come true.'
The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool, jumped and shouted'WINE'.
The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine. The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool.
Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and shouted, 'VODKA' and immersed himself into a pool of vodka.
The German was next and he jumped and shouted, 'BEER'. He was so contented with his beer pool.
The last is the American. He was running towards the pool when suddenly he steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards the pool and shouted,
'SHIT!!!!!!!.........'

*LESSON IV - THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU SAY SOMETHING,
BECAUSE SOMETIMES ACCIDENTS DO HAPPEN.*


LESSON 5
The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was in charge. Each organ took a turn to speak up:

Brain......... I should be in charge because I run all body functions.
Blood........ I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.
Stomach... I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.
Legs......... I should be in charge because I take the brain where it Wants to go.
Eyes......... I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.
Asshole.....I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.

All the other parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad.
To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.

Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief
Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly
Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable
Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred
Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body
Day 6 -The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in charge.

*MORAL OF THE STORY: NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN CHARGE.

今天是劳动节，不需要劳动，就躲在家里懒一番，想了很多事情，却写不出来。
偶然在马来西亚的《中国报》里发现一个有趣的 Blog 叫作 rudesingaporeans.blogspot.com，讲的是新加坡人种种缺德的行为，如无礼、怕输、怕死等，而写的人却是新加坡人自己。
其实，新加坡人很幸福，有一个干净的家园，还有很爱他们的政府。也许身在福中不知福，平时遇到小小的麻烦和不爽，很多都会大肆 complain 和计较，非要 100% 完美不可。新加坡已经是很不错了，为什么那些人还要 complain 这个，怕那个？有些甚至还逃兵役、移民，这狭窄的生活空间，真是道尽人生百态。也许，因为他们没有在马来西亚生活过，不知道什么是幸福，just take it for granted 。
在新加坡做了 6 年的外劳 a.k.a. 二等公民，亲眼看到这里的政府如何疼爱自己的人民，如何为新加坡的未来铺路，心里是多么的痛和羡慕。而马来西亚的政府却为了种族利益，自己人打自己人，贪污盗窃，连国家的未来都给丢了。说什么 2020 年宏愿，就算再等 100 年，马来西亚还会是老样子，四个字——不思进取。现在，连印尼、泰国和越南都开始赶上来了，100 年后，马来西亚会不会是东南亚最落后的国家？哎......